Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
