i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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