Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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