is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
