Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Randomize
