They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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