Got a toothbrush?
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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