I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
