super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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