Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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