Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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