we're blogging at a bar
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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