She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
