it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
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