dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Randomize
