Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
