Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize
