Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
