there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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