I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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