Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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