Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
