she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize