Why are handjobs necessary in class?
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
