You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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