playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
