This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
