She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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