I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
