Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize