I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
