this just has baby written all over it
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
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