last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
