Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
