But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
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