But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Randomize
