Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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