this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize
