Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
