No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize