I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
