And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
