no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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