I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
