Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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