he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Randomize
