Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
