Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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