handjob tips. give me some.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
