if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize