On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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