i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
